Mama Love

If there is one thing I've learnt about women over the past few years it's this; we need a lesson in love.  There's a relationship breakdown occurring and it's one with ourselves. Now I could turn this into a really corny self-help load of crap but I wont (well I hope not) because what is happening is not only serious but damaging.  I have worked in the fashion industry since high school and in that time I've dressed many women of all life stages.  I've also gone through some pretty big personal changes myself and you know what I hear time and time again? Here's a taste:

• "I need to get rid of {insert body part}"
• "I need to get skinny" (I don't see anything wrong to begin with)
• "I wish I could wear that"
• "People will think.........."
• "I need to cover/hide {again, insert body part}"

We live in a world where the media are constantly shoving images of celebrity mums who've bounced back to their pre-baby sizes before they've walked out the delivery room (case in point: Sarah Stage, Lara Bingle).  Or incredible weightloss transformations (I'm looking at you Khloe Kardashian).  Or the poor girl on Instagram (Bec Judd) who can't post a photo without some idiot telling her to "eat a burger".  F@#! it's no wonder we are ALL so self concious! And it's not just the younger generation - just look at the 50 & 60 year old stars who look like they haven't aged a day. Hoards of beauty products spamming our shelves and magazine pages claiming to erase fine lines and wrinkles - who the F@#! cares?!! Oh that's right we do, because we live in a society where as one quote perfectly puts it:

"We struggle with insecurity because we CONTINUALLY compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel."

And it's not just women who've birthed children who cop it. We are ALL guilty of being aboard the bandwagon/judgemental train at some point.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for a healthy lifestyle.  I think we should all be aware of not just the obesity crisis but also the additives and nasties within our households.  HOWEVER at the end of the day I don't give two s#%ts if you're a gym bunny or you spent your day off veg-ing out on the lounge with some M&M's (hopefully the peanut variety).  I also don't give a crap if you get up early to do your hair and make-up for the day or choose to spend that extra 45 minutes in bed.  Hopefully there's a balance in there but if not, don't stress! Do what you need to do because it makes YOU feel happy. Not because you need to keep up an image.

In a world where there is so much pressure on our physical appearance I want to see my tribe of mamas take equally good care of their mental health.  Numerous people close to me have struggled with depression (both the post natal & general variety) over the years. I myself have slipped into it a few times. That's a topic for another day but my point is this:

When a friend is down in the dumps or says something negative about themselves we are the first to comment "you're gorgeous" and "you're body is smoking". When do we ever say this about ourselves??  Stop picking out all the pieces you want to change and start complimenting the bits you love.

I want to use my position within this industry (which is often accused of being vain) for good not evil.  I want to help women of ALL ages and life stages feel good about themselves.  Whether it's a quiet hour to fit in a workout each morning or a new top that is flattering - I'm all for whatever gives a new mum some confidence.  Actually not just new mums, whatever gives ANY WOMAN some confidence.

So welcome to Frankie & Dandelion's new 'Mama Love' series where I will be spotlighting the amazing journey we go through as women.  Hopefully providing some helpful style tips along the way but more importantly spreading this message:

"You're doing a great job.  You're gorgeous how you are.  Keep going."

Tess. Xx.